Tomb Raider review

[Administrator]

Come, young adventurer. Or, if you remember the original Tomb Raider games: come, adventurer. Down the narrow passage, through the great stone doorway, into the torchlit chamber. Tread with reverence, for this is the final resting place of gaming's fallen heroes.
Here lies BloodRayne, buried in her best leather waistcoat. Alongside, marked by a tattered elephant jockstrap, is the grave of Leisure Suit Larry. Over there are the fossilised remains of Gex the gecko, Bubsy the bobcat and Q*bert the whatever the heck Q*bert was. Soldiers all. Let us remember them with a moment's silence, ignoring the sound of Nintendo's scraping shovels and Sega doing unspeakable things to corpses.
Now, look to the sarcophagus with the thinnest layer of dust and push back the lid. Rummage through crumbling bones and you will find a pair of pistols, 47 first aid kits and a bra big enough to hold hamster balls. Here lies Lara Croft, deader than the first bat she ever shot in the face.
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