how Things Work

[[BiA] MavericK]

This mail was sent to my brother, but for some reason they didn't include Mexico, so we included it

No offence

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A SOUTH AFRICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
They get stolen, so you steal someone
else's cows and shoot the owner.

A ZIMBABWEAN CORPORATION
A farmer has two cows.
You take over his farm, eat both cows and wait for the international
community to supply more.


A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You re-design them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow
and produce twenty times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon
images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and
milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You pray to them for food.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
You break for lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
You count them again and learn you have 12 cows.
You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the
newsman who reported the numbers.

AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
The one on the left is kinda cute...

A MEXICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
One runs to the other Corporation's land because there is greener pasture.
You try to negotiate with the other Farmer to let your cows eat in his yard
instead of fixing your yard first.
You invite other cows from other corporations to dump on your land,
thinking that you may be able to milk them while they are here.
You milk the remaining cow for all the milk you can.
You sell the milk you got at a good price. You keep half of the money and
spend one fourth in proportioning yourself and one fourth on the basic needs
of the remaining cow.
At the end you blame the universe, the other corporations and your cows for
not having any money, telling your cows that they are lazy and they don't
produce sufficient Milk like other corporations.
You retire early and go to live to another corporation's land because their
land is better than yours and you like their milk more.
You write a book explaining why your corporation is as bad, how good you
did your work while you lead the corporation and how you are not responsible
for what happened.

[Ritsuzen]

lol omg Mav, this is great! haha

[[BiA] DJ]

Irish Corporation

You have two cows

You breed them and give everyone two free cows so they can breed them too then you make a law saying everyone must have at least two cows then you slap on a Environmental Manure Tax, Environmental impact tax, Environmental Recycle Tax, Environmental Investment Tax, Environmental Milk Tax, Environmental Environmental Tax, a milk yeald tax, VAT and charge them because you had to collecting the tax, add corporation tax plus profit tax and corporation Environmental tax put the money in an offshore account, plead poverty and lie like a whore in a convent, have a public investigation at the tax payers expense, blame the cows and lock them up at the tax payers expense, bill the tax payers for loss of earnings and defence costs.

oh! and Environmental Wind tax cause cows fart a lot

[[D12C]Millpucky]

roflmao!!!!

[[BiA] DarkAngel]

LOL