Spam

[Bertie]

This is all spam!

[[BiA]Wonderboy]

I'll lived a life that full,
I've travelled each and every byway.
but more, much more than this ...
I SPAMMED it my way

[[BiA]Wonderboy]

There were two gold fish in a tank.
One turned to the other and said .....
"Do you know how to drive this thing?"


Q. What do you call a fish without an eye?
A. Fsh!

Did you hear about the plastic surgeon who sat by the fire & melted?

Two surgeons talking
"What are you doing now?"
"I'm taking out tonsils. One snip and Bob's your uncle. What are you doing?"
"Oh, I'm doing sex changes. One snip and Bob's your aunty"

Q. Why don't Barbie and Ken have any children?
A. Because they come in separate boxes.

Q. What's the difference between Joan of Arc and Noah's Ark?
A. One's made of wood, the other is Maid of Orlean's.

Is everyone losing interest?


Will I ever find out exactly what did happen one time at the band camp?

[Bertie]

"Is everyone losing interest?"

...Sorry what were you saying?

[[BiA]Wonderboy]

Where there's smoke there's SPAM

A rolling stone gathers no SPAM

Don't put all your SPAM in one basket

Don't cry over spilt SPAM

A SPAM in the hand is worth two in the bush

People who live in glass houses should not throw SPAM

I think I may have foot and mouth disease.
Every time I open my mouth, I put my foot in it.

Time flies you cannot they are erratic
(It can be a sentence with the correct punctuation)

I used to be indecisive, but I'm not sure now!

Apathy, who cares?

[[BiA]Wonderboy]

Students version of "I will survive"

"At first I was afraid, I was petrified!
Kept thinking I could never pass with no revision guide,
But then I spent so many nights, getting all the questions wrong,
And I grew strong, And I learned I could scrape along,
I won't look back, to any place,
When I can swallow 15 shots and get completely off my face,
I would have revised by the clock, I would have had no spare time free,
If I'd thought for just one second my exams would bother me,
So all my notes, are on the floor,
Don't even matter... that there's no Play night anymore...
Weren't you the one who tried to get me to revise?
You think I'd crumble? You think I'd work towards the skies?
Oh no, not I! I won't revise!
Unless I die from alcohol, I know I'll stay alive,
Though my money's at an end,
I've my overdraft to spend,
I won't revise, I won't revise!!

It took all the strength I had, not to act the part,
But in the end my real revision didn't even start.
I used to sit at home at night, feeling sorry for myself,
I used to try, But now I hold my head up high,
And you see me! Somebody new!
I'm not that mixed up weird bloke who wants a good 2:2
So if you feel like dropping in, chances are that I'll be free,
Coz I've done f**k all revision, and I'm failing my degree,
Oh no, not I! I won't revise,
I think that I may scrape a third, but I could be telling lies!
Let the lecturers all scorn,
My bed's far too nice and warm,
I won't revise, I won't revise, Oh dear!!"

[Bertie]

Aaaaarrrrgggghhh you got the 800th post

But not to worry...

3 is still the magic number

[[BiA] MasterMind]

LOL doc

[|BoB| Michael]

Originally posted by |AoD|ThunderBalls
Aaaaarrrrgggghhh you got the 800th post

But not to worry...

3 is still the magic number

go for 900 buddy

ps.3 is a good number...........

[[BiA]Wonderboy]

This is realllllly bad

Julius Caesar was addressing the crowd in the Colliseum.
"Friends,Romans and Countrymen, lend me your ears.
Tomorrow I take our glorious army to conquer Northern
Europe and I shall start with France.
We shall kill many Gauls and return victorious".

The crowd are up on their feet
"Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees, hail mighty Caesar"

Brutus turns to his mate and says
"He disnae half talk some shi*e eh?"

Six months later, Caesar comes back having conqured France
and addresses the crowd in the Colliseum.
"Friends, Romans and Countrymen, I have returned from our
campaign in France and as I promised, we killed 50,000 Gauls".

The crowd
are up on their feet
"Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees, hail mighty Caesar".

Brutus says to his mate
"What a load of shi*e, I'm gonnae check this oot"

So Brutus sets of for France and three weeks later he comes
back to Rome.

Caesar is addressing the public in the Colliseum again
"Friends, Romans and Countrymen, tomorrow we set off for
Britain and we are going to sort these b*stards out"

The crowd are up on their feet
"Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees, hail mighty Caesar"

Brutus jumps up and shouts
" Caesar, you are a liar. You told us that you had killed
50,000 Gauls in France but I've been there tae check it oot
and ye only killed 25,000 !!!!"

The crowd are stunned and all sit down in silence.

Caesar gets up and looks slowly round the Colliseum then
across at Brutus and says:












Wait for it !!!















"Aye but away Gauls count double in Europe !!!"

[Bertie]

Did it ever occur to you people that you can post nearly anything here, as long as it’s not porn, profanity and anything to do with hacking.

Well here goes nothing…
Plz bear in mind only people that don’t mind looking at the most grotesque things in life or after life should visit this web site, also maybe only over 18’s only or people that don’t have a nervous deprivation should visit!


Sick as hell


Please dont come crying to me if you don't think it's in good taste!

[BananPure]

well i can only say
one time at the bandcamp .......

Nick

[|BoB| Michael]

Originally posted by |AoD|ThunderBalls
Did it ever occur to you people that you can post nearly anything here, as long as it’s not porn, profanity and anything to do with hacking.

Well here goes nothing…
Plz bear in mind only people that don’t mind looking at the most grotesque things in life or after life should visit this web site, also maybe only over 18’s only or people that don’t have a nervous deprivation should visit!


Sick as hell


Please dont come crying to me if you don't think it's in good taste!

this is not a good site bertie no offence buddy but its freaky and sick in my opinion,

[COR[NL]]

Bertie is always and every day and every minit looking to find his borders, if you are old enough like me(the old wolf) you understand the people better than wen you are young.

But Bertie be carefull out there, please.

[Bertie]

this could all be considered spam... oh ass i cant sign in